Humourous Diversions
50 More Benefits to Quitting Smoking

1.)I wont die before 50

2.)No more $35,000 heart surgeries at the age of 40

3.)No more coughing constantly

4.)No more trips to the doctor for bronchytis, sinus infections, allergies, pneumonia, and ear aches

5.)No more trips for cigarettes at 3 am, every day on the way to work, and every week for cartons

6.)No more stinking like stale cigarettes

7.)Wont have to clean all my windows in the cars and house every 3 months

8.) No more cologne, febreeze, carpet fresh, fans in windows in December, air fresheners, washing drapes, every 6 months etc etc

9.) No more burned cars, people, fingers, clothes , suits, floors, carpets, rugs, tables, hair, pets, kids, lips, beds, sheets, sofas, windowsills, etc

10.)No more fires and flaming trash cans being drug into the back yard

11.)No more sick kids with earaches, and hiding your smokes from the pediatricians

12.)Baby doesnt reek like a cheap cocktail lounge

13.)Dog isnt embarrased when the vet says her fur stinks like cigarettes.

14.)Dont get hit in the head with rain water, slush, or bees through your open car window anymore.

15.)Can actually sit thru movies, classes, seminars, and meetings without leaving for a smoke every hour

16.)Will save over $40,000 every 10 years from not spending money on
cigarettes

17.)People dont look at you like you are a piece of low class trash just because you are smoking

18.)Dont have to spend 1/2 you life standing in rain, snow, cold, and subzero weather smoking.

19.)Dont get burned with those little red hot rocks that fall out of your cigarettes and burn your arm

20.)You can breathe the next morning after drinking

21.)Dont have to re-paint your walls every 2 years, and prepping the walls doesnt consist of scraping your lung cheese off the walls with a putty knife next to your bed.

22.)Dont have to wash all your clothes once a year to get rid of the orange shoulders and necks from smoke

23.)Greatly reduce your chances of getting mouth/nose/
throat/lung/espohageal/ cancer, emphesema, asthma, stroke,sinus infections, allergies, ulcers, ear aches, circulatory diseases, heart failure, glaucoma, viruses, bacterial and fungal infections, peridontal diseases, polyps, and over 50 other serious diseases, that actually strike most smokers in their 30's, 40's and 50's not in their 80's, like they thought it would.

24.)Wont need to waste thousands of dollars on all those other things that smoking costs you like teeth whiteners, trips to the dentist and doctors, chapstick, lighters, ashtrays, repairing or replacing burnt items, decongestants, eyedrops, breath mints, deoderizers, antibiotics, gum, etc. etc.

25.)Kids wont smoke by following your example

26.)You will be around to see your kids grow up without being the only parent in the audience with an O2 tank or inhaler etc.

27.)Be able to do things with you family and have the breath to do it

28.)Family and friends wont have to be embarrased by the fact you have a smoke dangling out of your mouth in public when they are with you

29.)Get better seating everywhere without waiting longer

30.)You wont have to storm off mad every time you find out they dont allow smoking somewhere, or someone yells at you for smoking at the wrong place even though there werent any signs

31.)You wont have to load up like a pack mule with lighters, multiple packs of smokes etc. every time you go out.

32.)Wont have to lie to your doctor when he asks you if you smoke, after you go in for chronic bronchitis for the 3rd time in 6 months

33.)You wont have to still continue to smoke even though you cant even breathe when youre deathly ill.

34.) Will be able to sleep 8 hours without getting up every 2 hours for a cigarette

35.) You wont burn your house down and your family in it due to smoking

36.)2 Words-Time Management when you dont have to wake up, have 3 smokes, shave, have a smoke, shower, have a smoke, get dressed, have a smoke, and so on all day long. In my case I smoked 3 packs of 100s a day, which meant I wasted 10 hours a day just smoking, which means I just doubled my productivity at work when I quit.

37.) You and your whole families life wont need to revolve around your next cigarette

38.) You wont need to check into stinky motel rooms and drive stinky rental cars, or be charged extra for smoking in them

39.) You wont have to pack half your suitcases up with smokes every time you leave town

40.) You dont have to spend hours each week emptying ash trays, and cleaning them out

41.) No more picking up thousands of cigarettes butts in my yard all the time

42.) Families vacation wont need to waste time as you visit every discount tobbaco outlet along the way looking for a reasonably priced carton of smokes

43.)You wont need to run 2.3 miles just to suck down 2 smokes at airports like Atlanta, in the lousy 20 minutes you have between flights and miss your connecting flight.

44.)You wont have to loiter around sub-human trashy people congregated around smoking areas for the rest of your life.

45.)You wont end up one of those shriveled up smokers that looks like the Marlboro man at 50 or one of those leather skinned old ladies with the bright orange lipstick, in an ornament clad pantsuit, that talks with a husky voice and refers to everyone as "Boy", "Hon", or "Missy".

46.) Exercising actually makes sense again, and is enjoyable

47.) You wont pollute every campsite, good fishing spot, and piece of pristine wilderness area you visit anymore, and nothing is more attractive than seeing a floating butt go down the river at Glacier National Park, or burning down a national treasure.

48.)Youll be able to smell and taste again and enjoy all those favorite outdoors spots, instead of just smelling a cigarette burning.

49.) Children wont hurt themselves or destroy property from matches or lighters left around all the time

50.)I Wont set myself or others on fire or die in an explosion every time I am around gas, paint, propane, hairspray or any other of the hundreds of flammables we come in contact with every day.